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Symptoms of Sexual Abuse, from 11/15/10

Here you can speak freely, as we are committed to letting everyone be heard. Moralisms and censorship only perpetuate denial. Many people have never been able to speak their actual experience and be heard in their entire lives.

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Symptoms of Sexual Abuse, from 11/15/10

Postby Becoming Other » Fri Jul 22, 2011 8:18 pm

Reposted from WAINAC Google. No additions or alterations:

What follows is a list of the long term effects of childhood sexual
abuse, presented by a law firm which specializes in such cases:

Long-Term Effects of Abuse

Among the life changing, long-term effects of abuse reported by adult
survivors of sexual abuse, are both the logical as well as the
unexpectedly dramatic negative additions to a victim's personality and
physical makeup. These effects include:

Drug and alcohol abuse
Failed personal and romantic relationships
Loss of religious faith, in cases of clergy abuse
Disinterest in family relationships
Disintegration of a family
Poor self-esteem
Feelings of deep depression
Difficulties with casual social relationships
Feelings of isolation and despair
Loss of trust in authority figures and institutions who don't report
child molestation
Despair in reaction to persecuting attitudes of police
Inappropriate sexual behavior
Poor work habits
Unemployment or underemployment


Notice that the items on this list are exactly those things which our
society uses to diminish someone, and what many parents use to
denigrate their adult children. This is so because the items on this
list run afoul of the self-reliance ethic.

So pedagogy is employed in justification of the self-reliance ethic.
Intervention is absent because of the self-reliance ethic.
Forgiveness and zero redress are accepted because of the self-reliance
ethic. And often people have children of their own to show that they
are fulfilling the self-reliance ethic.

It is presumed that without the Family System, children would starve,
or at least be deprived. To the extent that this is so, it is
rationalized by the self-reliance ethic. To the extent that this is
so, we all are responsible because we don't do anything about it.

It is presumed that we need the self-reliance ethic and to keep
families in isolation, without public sector support, because
otherwise there is no way to keep people in harness and no way to
limit the birth rate.

It is wrong for a parent to use a child to manipulate a spouse, but it
goes on all the time. It also should be seen as wrong for the State
to turn a blind eye to the welfare of children in order to control
adults. Richard Nixon vetoed universal day care because, "It would
Sovietize the American Family."

In Western Europe there is organized opposition because they have
Marxism. In the US we don't have Marxism. Instead we have Born Again

It is presumed that we need pedagogy, otherwise who knows what
children would turn into. It is presumed that we need the self-
reliance ethic otherwise people would be slothful.

The self-reliance ethic is pedagogy and pedagogy is the self-reliance

Above you see the list of long term effects of childhood sexual
abuse. I submit to you that the long term effects of childhood
emotional abuse are going to be the same.

Religion makes people feel guilty and sinful. I feel that most
therapy is just a different way of doing the same thing. It tells
people that they can talk about abuse, but that they cannot do
anything about it, and that wanting to do anything about it is wrong.
So they are therefore the cause of their own suffering and they are
responsible for not having forgiven and forgotten sooner.

If your life affirming instincts have been badly damaged and your
entire life badly damaged, shouldn't you want to do something about

It is crucial to an abused child's recovery that she be told what
happened was neither her fault nor a figment of her imagination,
Vachss explained to them. The clearest and strongest way the message
can be communicated, he said, is by telling her that society has
punished the person responsible—when it has. "If you're prepared to
change your position and see this for what it is, let's work together
to see that [Tynan] is indicted," Vachss challenged.
Vachss, Fresh Air Fund
http://www.vachss.com/guest_dispatches/ ... tle_3.html

Lots of people have grown up poor and under bad conditions. Often
they do just fine.

I don't think someone who has been used by the family system, and who
has not responded in some concrete manner, can ever live well. Their
relation to the world will permanently be circumscribed, defined, by
the ways in which they were used. I see the above list of effects as
evidence of that.
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